Hello, my dear friends! It has been a hectic week for me. I had to finish my Christmas shopping, bake cookies, clean the house, break up the first Christmas Break fight, and generally just wishing that I could hit the eggnog and drink myself into a stupor. It has been a hard week for us. The kids were a little afraid to go to school on Monday due to the events of last Friday. We don't shelter our children from news like that. We discuss it, and do our best to explain things and answer their questions. Our girls understand that not all people are good people. We feel knowledge is power. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. So my first All I Want for Christmas is: I wish that the Sandy Hook event hadn't happened. In lieu of that, I wish that the families of Newtown find peace.
All I want for Christmas is for these &#%*#^#*@^ Christmas cookies to be done. I like to bake, but I absolutely detest Christmas baking. There is so much baking and decorating and dishes. Oh my God, the dishes! I hate these Pinterest moms with their perfect snowman cookies and reindeer cupcakes. The odds are that the cut out cookies will get made but those suckers are most likely not going to be frosted. I am certainly not going to take hours to pipe a smile on each one. Most of the time I can barely handle my rage against the cookies long enough to finish baking them. That's right. I feed my kids rage-laced cookies. I am told it doesn't affect the flavor.
All I want for Christmas is for my house to stay clean. When I pick up a room, I do not want to walk in five minutes later to find a bunch of junk on the floor. Heaven forbid that I find cookie crumbs all over. Heads will roll if I find a half-eaten cookie. (I worked hard on those damn things.) Newsflash family members! We have a trash can, toy boxes, laundry baskets, and lots of other places to put things. The only thing I should see on my floor is the rug.
All I want for Christmas is some peace and quiet. I want absolute silence. No television noise, no Christmas music, no fighting children (more on this later). I just want quiet. I want to be able to lay on the couch for fifteen minutes without anyone talking to me. I want to be able to hear my heartbeat. I can dream, can't I?
All I want for Christmas is for the kids to be in school again. They have been out for break since yesterday. I have already broken up fights, sent kids to their room, and locked myself in the bathroom. I have come to cherish that wonderful time of day when the house is quiet and peaceful. I can get things done. I can take a shower without anyone knocking on the door and telling me that they need something. Those hours are blissful. I need them. It is the only way I hang onto my sanity.
All I want for Christmas is a happy Christmas. I want to snuggle up with my girls and watch Christmas movies. I want to see their eyes light up when they open their gifts. I want to have an awesome dinner with my family, even if it means that I have to cook it. I want all of you to have a very happy holiday with your families. Thank you to everyone who reads my blog. I appreciate you sharing a bit of your time with me. I hope that I have made you laugh and made you think. I hope that I am one of the highlights of your week. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.
Friday, December 21, 2012
Friday, December 14, 2012
Shooting Stars
Sometimes I worry about the influences my daughters have in their life. They watch things on television, have different kids around them at school, hear things in songs on the radio, and of course they are influenced by me (the poor things). How do I know that the small amount of time that I have with them each day is being spent the right way? I am busy. They are busy. When they come home from school there is homework and chores, and before too long I have to begin supper preparations. I worry, and I know that a lot of other mothers have this worry too.
I don't want to take away television (I watched television when I was little, and I am okay, sort of.). I don't want to home school them because I would go insane and I want them to have social interaction with kids their age. (Not that I am saying anything negative about home schooling. I have great respect for parents who take on the responsibility of educating their kids.) I can control what they listen to on the radio, and I do for the most part. I can only listen to The Dirty Sock Funtime Band for so long before my ears start to bleed. As for my influence, I can only do my best and hope it is good enough.
Once in a blue moon, my daughters will do something that makes me feel like I am getting it right. Those are the days that every hard day feels worth the effort. I had one of those days yesterday. The girls decided not to watch their hour of television after school. Instead, they decided to play upstairs. I listened at the bottom of the stairs to make sure they were playing together and not excluding someone. The pretend game that they decided to play was "Library". They took turns being the librarian. They checked out books, and returned them on time. I felt so proud. We LOVE to read in our house. The kids deciding to play "Library" showed me that my husband and I are passing along our deep love of the written word.
We also watched the meteor shower last night. It was truly spectacular. The best part was getting to hear the astonishment in the girls' voices when they saw their first shooting stars. They didn't complain that they were cold or that they would rather be inside watching television. They laid next to me on the deck and giggled with glee at the light show.
Sometimes the best things in life are the little things. I would never trade the experience of hearing the girls play "Library" or being with them for their first meteor shower. Those are the little moments that I can hold in my heart for years to come. No matter where the girls go or what the future has in store for us I can pull those moments out and savor them. It is at those moments that I am truly blessed.
I don't want to take away television (I watched television when I was little, and I am okay, sort of.). I don't want to home school them because I would go insane and I want them to have social interaction with kids their age. (Not that I am saying anything negative about home schooling. I have great respect for parents who take on the responsibility of educating their kids.) I can control what they listen to on the radio, and I do for the most part. I can only listen to The Dirty Sock Funtime Band for so long before my ears start to bleed. As for my influence, I can only do my best and hope it is good enough.
Once in a blue moon, my daughters will do something that makes me feel like I am getting it right. Those are the days that every hard day feels worth the effort. I had one of those days yesterday. The girls decided not to watch their hour of television after school. Instead, they decided to play upstairs. I listened at the bottom of the stairs to make sure they were playing together and not excluding someone. The pretend game that they decided to play was "Library". They took turns being the librarian. They checked out books, and returned them on time. I felt so proud. We LOVE to read in our house. The kids deciding to play "Library" showed me that my husband and I are passing along our deep love of the written word.
We also watched the meteor shower last night. It was truly spectacular. The best part was getting to hear the astonishment in the girls' voices when they saw their first shooting stars. They didn't complain that they were cold or that they would rather be inside watching television. They laid next to me on the deck and giggled with glee at the light show.
Sometimes the best things in life are the little things. I would never trade the experience of hearing the girls play "Library" or being with them for their first meteor shower. Those are the little moments that I can hold in my heart for years to come. No matter where the girls go or what the future has in store for us I can pull those moments out and savor them. It is at those moments that I am truly blessed.
Friday, December 7, 2012
Creative Creativity Genes
Today I was out shopping (God I love shopping.) for Christmas decorations. I walked around Hobby Lobby, Big Lots, Target, and even (the dreaded) Walmart. I wasn't looking for anything too specific. I wanted a couple of big bows for the pillars by our front door, a wreath, and maybe some lights to string around for some sparkle. I couldn't find any lights that made me think, "I must have you!". So a no go on the lights. I scored the bows at half price. (Dadadadadadadada dum BARGAIN HUNTER!) But the item that frustrated me the most was the over abundance of ugly, ugly, UGLY wreaths. They weren't only UGLY but they were expensive as well. I am not going to pay fifty bucks for a wreath that looks like an elf threw up on it. Call me cheap. It's not going to happen.
Luckily, I am the daughter of a very creative and talented woman. (Yes, I might be sucking up a little. It is the gift giving season. Sue me.) My mom was one of THOSE moms. I can remember her making her own wreaths. She hung her own wallpaper and did weird stuff with paint on the walls. She could make a slipcover for a couch. She sewed me a new Christmas dress every year. I think she made my sister a dress for homecoming once. My mom could wire electrical sockets, fix the garbage disposal, and still found time to play with us. My mom was Martha Stewart before Martha Stewart made it cool.
If my mom hadn't been the way she was, I might not have the courage or creative ability to do half of the things that I do. Anyway, back to my wreath. I decided since the other wreaths I had seen were really, really, really ugly that I would make one myself. I did steal the basis of my idea from a wreath I saw on Pinterest, but the color scheme and accessories are all me. Ok foam forms for wreaths are expensive! (I am a major cheapo, just so you know.) Hobby Lobby wanted eight dollars for a small wreath form. So I went into the needle point area and found an embroidery frame. It was eighteen inches in diameter and cost me five dollars. HA! I got lucky and tulle was on sale. 50% off to be exact. So I got 200 yards of white tulle and 12 yards of sparkly red tulle. The white cost me nine dollars and the red was two dollars. At Walmart I got a twelve pack of glittery red ornaments shaped like candies for 3 dollars. I also got a giant, silver, sparkly ornament of the word joy for two dollars.
So I got all the items for my wreath for twenty-one dollars which equals roughly half of what the UGLY wreaths were. I finished it in about two hours. It is so pretty and very girly. Girly works at our house. My husband approves of it also. (Not that he has a choice. It is a done deal.) I am also pleased with the wreath because I realized something while I was making it. I am influencing a new generation of creative, independent women. My girls watch (and sometimes help) me do things like knitting a sweater or rewiring a light switch. I hope that I am showing them that it is okay to do things yourself. Sometimes doing a project yourself instead of buying one doesn't turn out exactly the way you want. Sometimes it comes out even better. You get to have that feeling of pride when you look at what you have accomplished it because YOU accomplished it. It is better than the rush of buying something any day.
Luckily, I am the daughter of a very creative and talented woman. (Yes, I might be sucking up a little. It is the gift giving season. Sue me.) My mom was one of THOSE moms. I can remember her making her own wreaths. She hung her own wallpaper and did weird stuff with paint on the walls. She could make a slipcover for a couch. She sewed me a new Christmas dress every year. I think she made my sister a dress for homecoming once. My mom could wire electrical sockets, fix the garbage disposal, and still found time to play with us. My mom was Martha Stewart before Martha Stewart made it cool.
If my mom hadn't been the way she was, I might not have the courage or creative ability to do half of the things that I do. Anyway, back to my wreath. I decided since the other wreaths I had seen were really, really, really ugly that I would make one myself. I did steal the basis of my idea from a wreath I saw on Pinterest, but the color scheme and accessories are all me. Ok foam forms for wreaths are expensive! (I am a major cheapo, just so you know.) Hobby Lobby wanted eight dollars for a small wreath form. So I went into the needle point area and found an embroidery frame. It was eighteen inches in diameter and cost me five dollars. HA! I got lucky and tulle was on sale. 50% off to be exact. So I got 200 yards of white tulle and 12 yards of sparkly red tulle. The white cost me nine dollars and the red was two dollars. At Walmart I got a twelve pack of glittery red ornaments shaped like candies for 3 dollars. I also got a giant, silver, sparkly ornament of the word joy for two dollars.
Thursday, November 29, 2012
High Heels and Glitter.
I worry a little bit about that title. It may attract the wrong sort of "surfers" to my blog. Oh well, I'm going with what works the best. Last Saturday our family was able to attend my brother's wedding reception. We were more than happy to travel and celebrate with them. It was a beautiful reception. (Plus, it was open bar. Hehehehe.)
All of the women in our household needed new dresses for the party. Adelyn, our oldest daughter, needed new shoes as well. She decided that she was old enough for her first pair of high heels. While I was supportive, I did try to talk her out of them. (Her father was VERY unsure about the idea. That's his BABY.) I love high heels. I admit it. I have a weakness for a pretty pair of shoes. Adelyn (much like her mother) would not be swayed from the shoes. She is only seven. I guess we start the shoe fetish young around here.
At the party, we stood for pictures and to talk to friends and family that we hadn't seen in a while. The kids ran and played with their cousins while they waited (IMPATIENTLY) for the music to start and for the cake to be cut. It wasn't long before Addy came up to me complaining that her feet hurt. I got to say one of the favorite phrases of parenthood. "I told you so." Or as I usually phrase it: "I tried to tell you." Sometimes I am so much like my mother it scares me. Sometimes Addy is so much like me it terrifies me. (Karma, thou art a heartless bitch.) Luckily for my obstinate little one, I had stuffed an extra pair of socks into my purse before leaving for the party. I had a feeling that she would need them. (Sometimes I'm so awesome, I am surprised that I don't glow.)
After dinner, the tables and chairs were moved off the dance floor. Charlotte came running up to me. "Mom, they're gonna start the music! And then Phil and Flip are gonna dance!" She giggled and then ran away. Once the music had started, there were more little girls on the dance floor than adults. They jumped, spun circles, and shook their tail feathers. I think I even saw one doing the "Dougie". I couldn't help watching them and wondering how they could jump up and down like that without having to pee. If that had been me, I would have needed to pee.
The girls danced the night away. Adelyn would periodically put her heels back on, but they never stayed on for too long. She is getting so grown up. It is hard to imagine that she is seven already. This will be our seventh Christmas with her. Before too long she will be leaving for college and to start her own family. Eventually my brother's children will dance at Adelyn's wedding. It is easy to forget how quickly time can slip by and how temporary our time with our loved ones really is. Our children can't stay children forever nor would we want them to. All parents wish for the bittersweet time when our children spread their wings and experience life. We don't wish for it because we want them to leave. We want our kids to have the enjoyment (and frustration) of having their own families and making their own memories. We want the joys of discovering life again with a new generation. For now, my girls can take their time growing up.
All of the women in our household needed new dresses for the party. Adelyn, our oldest daughter, needed new shoes as well. She decided that she was old enough for her first pair of high heels. While I was supportive, I did try to talk her out of them. (Her father was VERY unsure about the idea. That's his BABY.) I love high heels. I admit it. I have a weakness for a pretty pair of shoes. Adelyn (much like her mother) would not be swayed from the shoes. She is only seven. I guess we start the shoe fetish young around here.
At the party, we stood for pictures and to talk to friends and family that we hadn't seen in a while. The kids ran and played with their cousins while they waited (IMPATIENTLY) for the music to start and for the cake to be cut. It wasn't long before Addy came up to me complaining that her feet hurt. I got to say one of the favorite phrases of parenthood. "I told you so." Or as I usually phrase it: "I tried to tell you." Sometimes I am so much like my mother it scares me. Sometimes Addy is so much like me it terrifies me. (Karma, thou art a heartless bitch.) Luckily for my obstinate little one, I had stuffed an extra pair of socks into my purse before leaving for the party. I had a feeling that she would need them. (Sometimes I'm so awesome, I am surprised that I don't glow.)
After dinner, the tables and chairs were moved off the dance floor. Charlotte came running up to me. "Mom, they're gonna start the music! And then Phil and Flip are gonna dance!" She giggled and then ran away. Once the music had started, there were more little girls on the dance floor than adults. They jumped, spun circles, and shook their tail feathers. I think I even saw one doing the "Dougie". I couldn't help watching them and wondering how they could jump up and down like that without having to pee. If that had been me, I would have needed to pee.
The girls danced the night away. Adelyn would periodically put her heels back on, but they never stayed on for too long. She is getting so grown up. It is hard to imagine that she is seven already. This will be our seventh Christmas with her. Before too long she will be leaving for college and to start her own family. Eventually my brother's children will dance at Adelyn's wedding. It is easy to forget how quickly time can slip by and how temporary our time with our loved ones really is. Our children can't stay children forever nor would we want them to. All parents wish for the bittersweet time when our children spread their wings and experience life. We don't wish for it because we want them to leave. We want our kids to have the enjoyment (and frustration) of having their own families and making their own memories. We want the joys of discovering life again with a new generation. For now, my girls can take their time growing up.
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Mom's Don't Get Sick Days!
Look at me! Two posts in two weeks, I'm setting a record here. If I was thinking straight, I would postpone this post so as not to give anyone unrealistic expectations of my posting talents. I blame the stomach bug that has been plaguing me for the past couple of days. I hate being sick. Well, really, who likes to be sick? Maybe super models that have eaten too much salt and need to de-bloat. But back to me. (I am narcissistic when I am sick.) I am ill. The world SHOULD revolve around me.
Unfortunately, moms don't get to wallow in bed like a Victorian lady. My ladies maid will not bring me tea and crumpets or sugared oranges. The nanny will not see to the children for me. The household staff will not make sure the house is dust free. The cook won't prepare supper for my family. It is depressing. I can't even read historical fiction whilst I am sick because it ticks me off.
Moms have to get up. We have to get the kids ready for school. Inspect toothbrushes to verify that the morning brushes did in fact happen. Make sure that shoes are on the right feet and tied in the necessary double knot. We have to feed them. Some moms are lucky enough to have all their children in school at the same time. (Unfortunately NOT the case for me.) When they are all gone, you might get a few blissful hours of decongestant laced, uninterrupted sleep. If you still have little ones at home, you are doomed to making lunch, entertaining, and generally keeping your child alive. Normally this isn't the most difficult aspect of your day, but when you are sick it feels like you are competing in the decathlon while crawling over hot coals half dead. (Trust me. Not an exaggeration.)
I don't know about you, but it always seems like I get sick when my husband absolutely cannot take time off from work to help with the kids or (Heaven forbid.) take care of me. I often wonder if the work emergency is a ruse to get away from my germ infested self. (Yeah, I know you are fibbing sometimes. Never mind the fact that when you are sick, my dear husband, I make you homemade chicken soup. AHEM.) Until your hubby gets home, you are on your own.
I caught myself actually playing fetch with my youngest daughter today. I laid in bed and surreptitiously prayed to my maker for death. Charlotte wants to be entertained. I grabbed the little ball we have for the dog and tossed it into the next room. Charlotte retrieved it and brought it back. Once she seemed to lose interest in the game and I whistled at her to get her attention. (Hangs head in shame.) Desperation is the mother of invention.
The best advice I can give you moms is get your flu shot. Take your vitamins. Air out the house once a week. Buy Lysol and Clorox wipes in bulk. Check your stock of tissues and any preferred cold and flu medications. Here's to hoping that you survive the cold and flu season.
Unfortunately, moms don't get to wallow in bed like a Victorian lady. My ladies maid will not bring me tea and crumpets or sugared oranges. The nanny will not see to the children for me. The household staff will not make sure the house is dust free. The cook won't prepare supper for my family. It is depressing. I can't even read historical fiction whilst I am sick because it ticks me off.
Moms have to get up. We have to get the kids ready for school. Inspect toothbrushes to verify that the morning brushes did in fact happen. Make sure that shoes are on the right feet and tied in the necessary double knot. We have to feed them. Some moms are lucky enough to have all their children in school at the same time. (Unfortunately NOT the case for me.) When they are all gone, you might get a few blissful hours of decongestant laced, uninterrupted sleep. If you still have little ones at home, you are doomed to making lunch, entertaining, and generally keeping your child alive. Normally this isn't the most difficult aspect of your day, but when you are sick it feels like you are competing in the decathlon while crawling over hot coals half dead. (Trust me. Not an exaggeration.)
I don't know about you, but it always seems like I get sick when my husband absolutely cannot take time off from work to help with the kids or (Heaven forbid.) take care of me. I often wonder if the work emergency is a ruse to get away from my germ infested self. (Yeah, I know you are fibbing sometimes. Never mind the fact that when you are sick, my dear husband, I make you homemade chicken soup. AHEM.) Until your hubby gets home, you are on your own.
I caught myself actually playing fetch with my youngest daughter today. I laid in bed and surreptitiously prayed to my maker for death. Charlotte wants to be entertained. I grabbed the little ball we have for the dog and tossed it into the next room. Charlotte retrieved it and brought it back. Once she seemed to lose interest in the game and I whistled at her to get her attention. (Hangs head in shame.) Desperation is the mother of invention.
The best advice I can give you moms is get your flu shot. Take your vitamins. Air out the house once a week. Buy Lysol and Clorox wipes in bulk. Check your stock of tissues and any preferred cold and flu medications. Here's to hoping that you survive the cold and flu season.
Friday, November 16, 2012
Christmas Shopping...MEH
I have been suffering from writer's block. I would like to say that is because my delightful daughters have been behaving impeccably lately. (Bahahahahahah.....gasp....gasp.....hahahahahaha) The lack of posts lately hasn't been due to lack of material. The lack is clearly within me. I have not had the energy or will to put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard, if you will) as of late. We have recently relocated. (AGAIN) This time we were blessed to have the assistance of professional movers. Thank the Lord for them.
It is that time again. Black Friday is looming over us. Toy commercials send our children into a toy-lust frenzy. My girls will run about the room shouting, "I want that! I want that!" and occasionally "No, Paige I already called that one! Ha ha!". My favorite quote this season has been, "Mom, I want that! But you have to be eighteen or older to order!" (Yeah, I have that age thing covered. Don't worry.) Then they fight over who should get that particular toy for Christmas. (Dear God, the fighting.) Sometimes I think it would be easier to make the same list for each child and just buy three of everything. I guess that lacks imagination. When you add in nieces, nephews, parents, grandparents, and siblings the list becomes bigger and bigger with each person.
Every year I say that I will be done with my shopping before Thanksgiving. Every year I fail. (EPICALLY) I haven't even started so far this year. I could blame the move and other various reasons. The truth is that I can't bear the thought of starting. I am a normal woman. I love to shop. Christmas shopping has become a chore. Christmas itself has become more of a chore and less of a holiday.
So I have been trying to think of things to make it more fun. The truth is that once you grow up and become an adult and a parent Christmas becomes work. You have to make Christmas cookies, buy presents, wrap the presents, decorate the house, etc. As adults we have to WORK to make the holidays fun. We have to plan adventures for ourselves. We have to chose to have the holiday be fun.
Here are some things we do (as a family) every year to make Christmas more fun:
It is that time again. Black Friday is looming over us. Toy commercials send our children into a toy-lust frenzy. My girls will run about the room shouting, "I want that! I want that!" and occasionally "No, Paige I already called that one! Ha ha!". My favorite quote this season has been, "Mom, I want that! But you have to be eighteen or older to order!" (Yeah, I have that age thing covered. Don't worry.) Then they fight over who should get that particular toy for Christmas. (Dear God, the fighting.) Sometimes I think it would be easier to make the same list for each child and just buy three of everything. I guess that lacks imagination. When you add in nieces, nephews, parents, grandparents, and siblings the list becomes bigger and bigger with each person.
Every year I say that I will be done with my shopping before Thanksgiving. Every year I fail. (EPICALLY) I haven't even started so far this year. I could blame the move and other various reasons. The truth is that I can't bear the thought of starting. I am a normal woman. I love to shop. Christmas shopping has become a chore. Christmas itself has become more of a chore and less of a holiday.
So I have been trying to think of things to make it more fun. The truth is that once you grow up and become an adult and a parent Christmas becomes work. You have to make Christmas cookies, buy presents, wrap the presents, decorate the house, etc. As adults we have to WORK to make the holidays fun. We have to plan adventures for ourselves. We have to chose to have the holiday be fun.
Here are some things we do (as a family) every year to make Christmas more fun:
- Each child chooses an ornament from the Toys for Tots tree. We then have fun picking out a gift.
- We make a colossal amount of Christmas cookies. I let the kids decorate them. (They might not be perfect, but the kids have fun and that is all that matters.)
- Whenever we have a delivery, we have cookie bags made up and we hand them out to the delivery men as a thank you. (The looks on their faces are great, and they always remember you after that.)
- Each child gets a special set of Christmas jammies to wear on Christmas Eve.
- We have our go-to holiday movies. In the week before Christmas, we pick one each night to watch as a family.
- Every Christmas Eve, my husband reads our kids "The Night Before Christmas". I keep a log on the inside of the cover where I note each year that we have followed the tradition.
- The kids write letters to Santa (and he writes one back). They also go to visit him at the shopping mall.
- A few days before Christmas, Santa sends each of the kids a video email.
- Every year we hire an "Elf on the Shelf".
- Every year we go to a store called Tannenbaum's and the girls each pick out a blown glass ornament. I write the year purchased and the child's name on the bottom of each ornament. When we decorate the tree, we have fun pulling out the ornaments and remembering why that ornament was picked and what good things had happened that Christmas. Some day when the girls move out and start their own families, I will pack up their ornaments for them to have.
- My husband and I pick out an ornament for ourselves as well. We try to pick something that means something to our family for that year.
- If it snows we build a snow family. We also go sledding.
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Me First!
Everything with my girls is a contest now. I don't know when it happened. They compete for my attention. They compete to see who can brush their teeth the best, who is the fastest, who can help mommy with supper the most, etc. It goes on and on. While I try my best to assure them that they are all the greatest it still seems as though life hangs on the balance of who gets their dinner plate first.
I know some parents encourage their kids to compete. It supposedly makes them strive for excellence. As for myself, I wish they wouldn't compete so much. Every child has her strengths and her weaknesses. If one of those weaknesses happens to be in something a sibling excels at well... feelings of inadequacy and doubt. I know. I have been there. (I still feel that way sometimes. I think it must be normal.)
I try (Emphasis on try, I'm not perfect.) to divide the attention and the helping hands out equally. I don't know how it happens, but it always seems to end in a fight. "Mom, she put in the sugar!" "Mom, she had two cookies." "Mom, she got two turns." "IT'S MY TURN!" Until I am crazy and I feel like at any moment my hair will turn to snakes and I can turn people to stone with a glare. The silence would be nice.... Eventually I kick them all out of the kitchen so that I can have some peace. And so I can clean up the spills.
I regularly tell each one "You're my favorite" with a whisper in their ear. Because they are all my favorites. It makes them stand a little taller and smile a little wider. When they argue about it (Because they inevitably will.) I simply say, "You are all my favorites. Addy is my favorite because she is such a good big sister. She can run really fast, but she still slows her pace when playing with someone who can't run as quickly. She is my favorite little girl with brown hair. Paige is my favorite because she cares how other people feel. She is sensitive and knows when to be quiet or when to be silly. She is my favorite little girl with red hair. Charlotte is my favorite because she is content to play alone, but she still loves to snuggle up and watch a movie. She dances around to the music in her head. She is my favorite little girl with blonde hair."
I am hoping that the constant competition slows down as they get older and involved in different activities. They are together so much yet. I think they have to compete or they would just kill each other. I have to admit that I some times use their competitive nature to my advantage. "Who can finish their chores faster?" "Who can eat the most peas?" "Who can be the quietest?" "Who can go to sleep the fastest?" If they ever figure out my manipulation, I will probably be in trouble. But for now I will take my wins any way I can.
I know some parents encourage their kids to compete. It supposedly makes them strive for excellence. As for myself, I wish they wouldn't compete so much. Every child has her strengths and her weaknesses. If one of those weaknesses happens to be in something a sibling excels at well... feelings of inadequacy and doubt. I know. I have been there. (I still feel that way sometimes. I think it must be normal.)
I try (Emphasis on try, I'm not perfect.) to divide the attention and the helping hands out equally. I don't know how it happens, but it always seems to end in a fight. "Mom, she put in the sugar!" "Mom, she had two cookies." "Mom, she got two turns." "IT'S MY TURN!" Until I am crazy and I feel like at any moment my hair will turn to snakes and I can turn people to stone with a glare. The silence would be nice.... Eventually I kick them all out of the kitchen so that I can have some peace. And so I can clean up the spills.
I regularly tell each one "You're my favorite" with a whisper in their ear. Because they are all my favorites. It makes them stand a little taller and smile a little wider. When they argue about it (Because they inevitably will.) I simply say, "You are all my favorites. Addy is my favorite because she is such a good big sister. She can run really fast, but she still slows her pace when playing with someone who can't run as quickly. She is my favorite little girl with brown hair. Paige is my favorite because she cares how other people feel. She is sensitive and knows when to be quiet or when to be silly. She is my favorite little girl with red hair. Charlotte is my favorite because she is content to play alone, but she still loves to snuggle up and watch a movie. She dances around to the music in her head. She is my favorite little girl with blonde hair."
I am hoping that the constant competition slows down as they get older and involved in different activities. They are together so much yet. I think they have to compete or they would just kill each other. I have to admit that I some times use their competitive nature to my advantage. "Who can finish their chores faster?" "Who can eat the most peas?" "Who can be the quietest?" "Who can go to sleep the fastest?" If they ever figure out my manipulation, I will probably be in trouble. But for now I will take my wins any way I can.
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